Regular readers know that I’ve got an unhealthy level of interest in Don Surber’s blog. I just can’t help myself; he’s my local Limbaugh. He’s such a perfect specimen of the lizard brain mentality — you know, that hard core one-third of the population that still professes undying support for President Lame Duck no matter what — that I often check in with him just to see what twisted logic the lizards are currently employing to support their irrational take on the world.
Yesterday I was amused to see that The Surb posted a direct link to a porn site that has a video clip of a couple (the site claims it’s Britney Spears and Kevin Federline) engaged in a certain sexual act that Justice Scalia thinks the government should be free to criminalize. What is so amusing to me is not the fact that Surb linked to the latest faux* celebrity sex tape, but that in the very post in which he provides a direct link to the X-rated site, Surb says the following:
Drunken Stepfather has a clip of the Britney Spears sex tape. I’ll link it, but first, we really should not be watching. We should all move along. Nothing to see here.
Except we will all look. What kind of degenerates has society become whem [sic] a woman has sex with her own husband and we are shocked?
And then this:
Pretty odd how we use this wonderful technology we’ve been given with the satellites and computers to show something that happens a billion or so times a day. What a crass society. I seriously doubt George Mason, James Madison and Alexander Hamilton had this in mind when they crafted the First Amendment.
The hypocrisy, it burns! Since I’m unable to let things like this go unremarked upon, I left this comment:
Oh please, Don. You’re so concerned about our crass, degenerate society that you go ahead and link to the Britney sex tape (a fake one, at that). Why not just admit you love blogging about T&A, since you do it every week?
To which Surb responded:
Let’s see, 2K+ posts and I once posted about a girl who was fired for staring at her own breasts oh and about that guy who sought hits for his site for a 3some only to have it backfire
Yea, it’s a regular porn site I’m running here
That he missed my point entirely is unsurprising (he always does), but that he would claim to have only made two posts that could be categorized as “T&A” was indeed a shocker. As a regular reader, I have noticed that the Surb is a boob man. So I decided to do a quick search through his archives because just off the top of my head I could think of more boob posts than just the two he noted. (Should I have done something more worthwhile with my time yesterday? Absolutely. But when you get the day off because your office building caught on fire, I say you’re coasting on free time that’s just begging to be spent frivolously.)
I only had to scroll through a few months’ worth of Surb posts looking for boobs to amass almost a dozen links to prove Surb wrong. In a hilarious turn, after I painstakingly cut & pasted these links into a rather long comment on Surb’s blog, I got the following message from Haloscan:
Your comment contains too many links and will not be added
I laughed pretty hard at that. I couldn’t post the links to Surb’s T&A posts (an incomplete list, at that) because there were just too many of them! Kinda proves my point, doesn’t it? I clogged up Surb’s comment section in trying to break up my comment into parts, so it got all mangled and the whole effect was lost. I’ll recreate it in all of its glory here:
Yes, “every week” was a bit of hyperbole, and I’m not arguing that you run a porn site. I honestly don’t care how often you blog about T&A, though
it’s
more
often
than
you
think.I just think you should own up to it instead of lamenting our crass, degenerate society and then linking to a porn site while claiming it’s newsworthy.
Apparently
about them twice. Why not just admit that you like to post titillating pictures because you think it’s fun? The contortions of logic that some people have to go through to claim moral superiority over others is amusing to me.
Surber’s modus operandi when it comes to blogging about sex is the same as Bill O’Reilly’s m.o. for discussing sex on his show — presenting sexually titillating content under the guise of news. It has been said of O’Reilly: “He sells sex, even as he condemns it.” I’m reminded of the Parents Television Council’s web site, which used to post a collection of the “Worst TV Clips of the Week.” It was one-stop shopping for video of the most provacative scenes on television every week. (Apparently the PTC got wise, because they don’t have video clips there anymore.)
I know you don’t want to click all of those Surber links listed above (and I don’t recommend it), so I’ll just provide you with an overview in pictorial form. They say a picture’s worth a thousand words, so I guess my comment can be summarized thusly (all photos from Surb’s blog):
* I say “faux” because I’m pretty doubtful that the tape is authentic. Why, you ask? Well, because the “source close to Federline” quoted in the article that Surb linked to said that during their honeymoon, Britney and Kevin “did nothing all day but have sex—and play the odd game of chess.” Chess? Britney & Kevin? On their honeymoon? Riiiiight.
Incidentally, the article that got the ball rolling here is from a British tabloid called News of the World, which Richard Dawkins calls “Britain’s most disgusting newspaper.” I’m sure you won’t be shocked to learn that this tabloid is one of Rupert Murdoch’s papers. News of the World, along with many of Murdoch’s other media endeavors, is another perfect example of something that sells sex, even while condemning it.
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