Speed dating is coming to Charleston. I’ve never done it, nor have I known anyone who has (that I know of). I’ve never really tried any experiments in dating – no personal ads, no online dating services, no blind date set-ups through friends. No, I’m an old fashioned kinda girl. I just stick with the tried-and-true “barfly” method of dating.
So I have no intention of trying out speed dating, or “VDating,” as the establishment is calling it. (No, silly, not “The Establishment” – the establishment that is hosting the event. A word to the wise: don’t wear a t-shirt, punk!) No, this sounds like a terrible idea to me, for two reasons:
- It’s called “VDating.” Who’s the marketing wizard that came up with this? Thinking of venereal diseases doesn’t make me want to meet a roomful of strange men.
Bob Marketer: What feeling do we want to convey on these speed dating flyers?
Joe Marketer: How about a sensation of burning during urination?
Bob Marketer: VDating it is! - This one’s the kicker. The flyer says: “You’ll have up to ten one-on-one dates that last five minutes each.” That sounds like my nightmare. Let’s see, when are the most awkward moments of a date? Hmm…oh, I know! The first fucking five minutes! Sometimes ten. (Who am I kidding? With some guys, it lasts all night.) So why would I want to have ten awkward first date moments in a row, then call it an evening?
However, I have to admit that there is one aspect of speed dating that sounds very appealing:
“After the event, enter all of the names of people you want to meet again. Whenever two people enter each other’s names, we provide contact information so you can arrange a second date.”
No muss, no fuss! Just put that “You seem very nice, but…” or that “Well, it was an interesting evening” or perhaps that “Please don’t ever call me” into the hands of a helpful third party. Very tidy. Still, my gut says: nightmare.
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